Tantric Goddess Network


Sri Yogeswari -
my Tantric Journey

 

Many faces of Sri Yogeswari

Click any of my photos to see an enlarged view.

Yogeswari and her father playingYogeswari and her father playing

My father and me, having a good time. This photo was taken when i was three months and three days February 26th,  2007. Click any of my photos to see an enlarged view.

My name is Yogeswari. I’m a Tantric baby. I wanted to take a human birth so that I can further my journey home and merge with the cosmic Oneness. I chose to be born in India to Devanayagi, the most divine Mother. They say she’s a barbarian because she’s Dutch. I realize that she has worked very hard to be loving, graceful and soft; except when she walks-she stomps her way across the yard like a storm trooper.

I enjoyed living in my Mother’s womb. It was safe, warm and I got lots of touches. I felt very comfortable inside. There was lots of room to dance and kick. My daddy and mommy used to talk and sing to me. I especially enjoyed the hours and hours of mantras that people made together. Sometimes many people, sometimes only Mom and Dad, and sometimes only my Daddy.

I made myself noticeable to my Mommy just after I lived in my new home for three months. I showed up in her dream with my brother and Mommy said to him “Okay, now I’m going to take care of your sister”. She promised that she would take care of me. Upon hearing her voice I was reassured that she would nurture and support me in my journey to be the divine goddess I am. Every time she touched my new home I joyfully connected with her. I lit up every time she touched her belly and I sent bubbles of love to meet her hand.

When I was 14 weeks in my new home I nearly got evicted. The walls of my house became unsteady. Science people call this Placenta Previa. My daddy sent the energy of love into my bubble with his powerful, resonant voice so the walls shifted and became strong again.

I always connected with my daddy. Sometimes I felt restless, then my Daddy would put his hands on my Mommy’s belly and it felt nice and soothing. When I was sleeping, his touch woke me up. I felt beautiful, resonating vibrations enter the bubble I called my home, when I was asleep or awake. Sometimes even when my Mommy was asleep too. It was very powerful and resonant.

So, I grew and grew, listening to beautiful sounds of the goddess. Somehow my parents knew my divinity and honored me as Goddess-to-be, sending sounds of the goddesses into my home, which is their general spiritual practice.

As I grew, my house shrank. Finally I decided to become a part of the society outside my Mommy’s belly, knowing I would be cared for. In the excitement of coming out I got my umbilical cord wrapped around my neck. Even still, I tried to come out, but the doors wouldn’t open. Knowing I was destined to be a divine child and successfully take a human birth, I remained calm and healthy. Even though my Mommy went through 26 hours of labor and a lot of pain, she stayed calm and strong. She’s the best! So I felt calm and safe even under the stress of a difficult situation. During the labor there were lots of aunties sending their loving sounds and touch to the backside of my house, encouraging and soothing me, which created a very nice environment for me. Thanks to my aunty’s Annemiek, Nagarani, Shodi, and Shloshina, especially my Daddy, and of course my goddess Mommy, I came out okay.

Since the door wasn’t opening my auntie Annemiek, who is a midwife, decided Mommy should go to the hospital so the doctors could help me come out. Then the locals advised me and Mommy to a clinic in Thriumangalum. The doctor there was a fraud. She was rough with my Mommy’s belly and I could hear her saying untrue things about me. I could feel aunty Annemiek’s anger about the doctor’s lies. I was healthy inside. Aunty Annemiek had all of the newest hearing aids reassured me and my Mommy that I was okay and that we should leave that place because the doctor was only a butcher. She was only interested in cutting open my Mommy’s tummy, not because it was needed, but because it would fatten her wallet. So, then we were rushed to the Apollo hospital in Madurai. At least there they tried hard to give me a natural birth.

I tried and tried to open the doors but they wouldn’t budge. Suddenly a drug dealer doped up my Mommy and me. I couldn’t tell the difference between the doors and the walls, and all of a sudden the drug dealer used a crow bar to break down the walls of my house and two very large hands pulled me out.
I was born after midnight on the twenty-third, which made my Daddy very relieved. Instead of being born on the twenty-second, which is the governed by the north node, or Rahu in Vedic Astrology, I am a number five baby, governed by Mercury, the god of intelligence.

It wasn’t a very nice place that these two hands pulled me out into. I was used to the sounds, and vibrations of my Mommy and Daddy’s house. This place had obnoxious, glaring, artificial lights, yucky chemical smells, harsh, discordant sounds and mean aliens. I wanted to come out at my Mommy and Daddy’s house, so when they brought me out here I was very unhappy.

Whoop what a busy world to visit.  Humans have lost touch since my last birth, they have forgotten how to welcome children into the world. Yes very barbaric, yet they think that they are advanced in the art of birthing.

I came to a barbaric worldbabaric art of birthing, I feel hurtbabaric art of birthing, I could not stop crying

These strange aliens tossed me around like a sack of rice, called me names like “pink baby”, and told my Mommy I was fat. These aliens had no idea I was a divine baby, and the closer I looked, I realized they didn’t even know they were divine too. This is a strange world here. I didn’t like the way the aliens touched me, through ugly sounds towards me and stared and gaped at me like I was the alien. All of this made me very angry.

The aliens put me in a room with a lot of other babies. I didn’t like it there and I felt lonely without my Mommy and Daddy. The place they put me smelled bad and was harsh. I needed to get out of there. I noticed all of the other babies slept dopily. So I decided to revolt and make noise. Afraid that the other babies would follow my fearless leadership the aliens used to hurry me out of the room to be with my Mommy and Daddy, which is just what I wanted. Then I vigorously sucked at my Mother’s nipples and fell peacefully asleep. It was heaven to hear the familiar sounds and vibrations of my newest parents, who I chose to guide me through this leg of my journey home.

I was pushing my parents to take me out of the hospital and it’s restrictions to the free surroundings that my parents called home. I wanted to hear the familiar sounds and rhythms of the environment that I grew in. I had to wait for five days in the stinky hospital before we finally left to go home. I was driven to my new house by a very calm, careful uncle Saravan, who works as a chauffeur for my parents.

The welcoming reception was very nice and very spirited. There are very nice sounds like cows mooing, dogs barking, ducks quacking, crickets chirping, chickens scratching and clucking, roosters crowing, and village children laughing.

Within the first one to two weeks of moving into my new house I decided that we should move again. Even though it was spacious and luxurious with air conditioning, it was in the agni/fire corner of the property, which doesn’t suit my hot temper. I cried and cried and even came up with some rashes until my parents called an astrologer. He told them about the agni corner and so we moved to a smaller room without air conditioning that was closer to aunty Nagarani and my big brothers from the village.

I’m really happy to be in a community. There aren’t too many people; Just a few crazy Westerners and more even crazier villagers, who clap loudly in my face and pinch my cheeks. When my Daddy found out the village ladies who came to visit me in the beginning were loud and hurt my face, he put a full stop to that. Now no one carries me but my family, which is quite large. My over-caring parents have two housemaids that take care of me. One is a bit too loud, but the other is soft and nice. Then there’s crazy auntie Nagarani who carries me and waltzes around the farm, and sings me silly songs. Then there is my big brother Vinote, from the village who always wants to carry me and makes me smile. I have a very big family and it’s a good thing because I have enough energy to keep them all very busy!

I hear that many other babies like to sleep all the time when they are small like me. I stay awake all day and sleep at night. I enjoy exploring faces and looking at the beautiful colors around me in life and in a large painting on my porch. I like to talk to the beautiful fairies and spirits that come to visit me and encourage me to talk to them. They especially come talk to me when I’m in front of a huge mural my Mommy and auntie Nagarani helped to paint. To surprise my parents, within two months and 10 days of coming to join this outer society, I uttered my first word “haaai”. It’s sad to say that the fairies understand me better than the humans. So we have long conversations and they make me laugh. It’s such a peaceful environment.

Sometimes I speak to my parents but they don’t understand what I’m saying. At first I ask nicely. Then I get grumpy, and if they don’t understand what I want by then, I get very angry and cry loud. By then they are jumping up and trying everything to help me until they understand what I’m asking for. It gives me a good feeling to know they love me so much. They drop whatever they’re doing to nurture me and make me happy again.

Now, I know what my name Yogeswari means. I am named after the great goddess Durga. Instead of just calling me by my name, my parents sing me a mantra for Durga and worship my divinity with “Om Hrim Dum Yogeswari Namah aum”. This gives me great assurance that they will nurture my growing up to become the divine goddess I am. What gives me this confidence is that they understand that they are my care takes and do not own me, unlike what my past parents did, thus forcing me to take yet another journey towards HOME!

I wish all children had parents like mine, giving me the reassurance that I can fulfill my journey on Earth without allowing me to forget my real purpose on Earth – to return to my divine HOME. My parents are great believers and worshippers of the Mahavidyas, which is what I came to this world to discover.

Keep visiting my page for updates… To be continued as I grow and journey.
 

After a few hours

Feel peacful when I was returned to my Mother


On the top right-hand corner of this page you will find the sound of the Goddesses, Bija sound that are used during ParaTan sound healing. An Inner Tantric practice, deeper tradition of Tantra, its multidimensional vision of the Divine and its transformative practices of bija mantra that take us far beyond the outer models of how Tantra is usually presented today

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We are pro bring to you Bija Mantras of the Goddesses. When listening to this Audio-video, please use good headphones to enjoy the maximum healing benefit of the sounds. This is


 

 only a recording, when you receive a sound healing personally, it is much, much, more powerful.

 

Tantra the Way of Life, talk given by The Father of Para-Tan and Master of the Living Goddess Tradition and founder of the first Mahavidya Temple in Tamil Nadu, South India,
Shri Param Eswaran

Sri Renee Jeffus speaks about her experience after attending the Para-Tan Sound Intensive

For more videos on Tantra, Goddess Mantra and Planetary Mantra visit my IFC Mahavidya channel Youtube

LOVE IS THE POWER OF THE UNIVERSE and it is only through the light and way of love that we may raise our vibration and reclaim our inner divinity. Para Tan utilizes ancient sacred sounds to break up cellular memory and circulate Shakti aka LOVE aka SOUND through the body. This feeling of love is the orgasmic bliss of cosmic union with divinity within and around us.

 


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Last modified: September 20, 2015 04:02:52 +0800